Itchy feet

Tangled up in blue: let these pictures serve as a warning that this entry has no pretensions about not being pretentious.

Travel is in the air: the wind is blowing, spring is coming. And with this comes the yearly rush of forgotten energy, and perhaps foolish sense of possibility. At the onset of every Spring I feel like I start smelling again, and with every scent comes dejavu. I smelled Paris in my hand cream the other day and then I was subsequently reminded of spring in New York, when living in the Broome street dorm, my window open because being freezing is better than stifling dorm air, I smelled something and the light came in in such a way that I was reminded of Paris.

I want to go somewhere and return to where I was and hopefully keep moving too. I will travel! My life here is finished as far as I know in August and as long as my health holds I don't cost so much..





My view from the Broome Street dorm. That building was almost too wonderful and it helped to get me through the year. What I don't miss about the location was living on the fire route, with only 3/4 of a wall and a roommate who felt that one of her unalienable rights was to watch TV until 5 am. Actually, that last year in college was one of rather stagnating depression and I sometimes still wonder if I have snapped out of it. Wow! Look at all this crap I am revealing. Here's another thing: I went to the doctor then because I kept having signs of an illness--pretty much what I have now, sinus infection/allergy type stuff, and the doctor did a physical and blood tests and then called me back when the results were in:

Doc: Well, the tests don't show anything. Are you interested in taking anti-depressants?
So: No.
Doc: Just like that?

How can this doctor I have seen once suggest that? Bizarre. I should have known though that an obese doctor may have a slightly different philosophy of health than I do. Isn't medicine such a big deal? Aren't you supposed to know more than simply your patient is tired and that she tested negative for lupus before that is your next option?